Aunt Karen

A teacher told her young class to ask their parents For a family story with a moral at the end of it, and To return the next day to tell their stories.

In the classroom the next day, Joe gave his example First, “My dad is a farmer and we have chickens. One Day we were taking lots of eggs to market in a basket On the front seat of the truck when we hit a big bump In the road; the basket fell off the seat and all the Eggs broke.”

The moral of the story is not to put all Your eggs in one basket..

“Very good,” said the teacher.

Next, Mary said, “We are farmers too. We had twenty Eggs waiting to hatch,but when they did we only got Ten chicks.”

“The moral of this story is not to count Your chickens before they’re hatched ..”

“Very good ,” said the teacher again, very pleased with The response so far.

Next it was Barney’s turn to tell his story: “My dad Told me this story about my Aunt Karen…. Aunt Karen Was a flight engineer in the war and her plane got Hit. She had to bail out over enemy territory and all She had was a bottle of whiskey, a machine gun and a Machete.”

“Go on,” said the teacher, intrigued.

“Aunt Karen drank the whiskey on the way down to Prepare herself; then she landed right in the middle Of a hundred enemy soldiers. She killed seventy of Them with the machine gun until she ran out of Bullets. Then she killed twenty more with the machete Till the blade broke. And then she killed the last ten With her bare hands.”

“Good heavens,” said the horrified teacher, “What did Your father say was the moral of that frightening Story?”

The child said “Stay away from Aunt Karen when she’s been Drinking.”

Main Computer Box

The main computer box is made of several computer hardware components and subcomponents which include:

* The case – The outside component which provides protection for the parts inside and provides a fan and power supply which are used to both cool the working parts inside and provide power to them.

* The motherboard – Hold the following computer hardware subcomponents:
o Memory – Used to provide temporary storage of information as discussed earlier.

o Microprocessor – Used to provide the processing of data function as discussed earlier.

o Video interface card which is also called the video card – This card is an interface between the computer monitor and the motherboard and its subcomponents such as the microprocessor and memory. This card may be included as part of the motherboard or it may plug into a card slot on the motherboard.

o Sound card is an interface between the computer speakers and the motherboard and its subcomponents such as the microprocessor and memory. This card may be included as part of the motherboard or it may plug into a card slot on the motherboard.

* One or more permanent storage devices some of which may be optional:

o Hard disk – Most computers today have a hard disk (sometimes called hard drives) which is the component most commonly used to provide permanent storage of data. Hard disks are usually permanantly installed in a computer.

o CD ROM drive or DVD drive – Used to provide permanant storage of data but this type of drive is used to bring information into the computer more commonly than it is used to store information from the computer. Sometimes this type of drive is used to back up data from the hard drive so data is not lost if a hard drive breaks. A DVD drive holds more data than a CD ROM drive and DVDs have enough storage capacity that they may be used to play or store movies. The storage media, the CD ROM or DVD may be removed from the computer.

o Floppy Drive – A low capacity storage device which can be written to as easily as it is read. The floppy disk may be easily removed from the computer. It is called a floppy because the part of the media that holds the data is on a material that is not rigid but it is enclosed in a more rigit case to give it durability.

There are also other minor computer hardware components inside the case which include cables which may be used to hook other internal parts together along with connecting an interface to the case for printers and other devices such as a high speed serial bus called USB. (A serial bus simply refers to the fact that data is sent in a stream which is like sending one bit at a time.

Computer Hardware

The term computer hardware refers to the various electronic components that are required for you to use a computer along with the hardware components inside the computer case. As you know your computer equipment is made of several common components. These include:

* The main computer box.
* A monitor – Looks like a television screen.
* A keyboard.
* A mouse.
* Speakers.
* An optional printer

The main computer box is the main component of the computer. It has computer hardware parts inside that perform the following functions:

* Temporary storage of information (known as data in more technical terms) – This function is done by memory.
* Permanent storage of information – This function is done by a hard disk, floppy disk, or CD ROM.
* Manipulation or processing of data – Used to determine where data is stored and perform calculations which support operations that the user is doing.
* Interfacing to the outside components or to the outside world – This supports the ability for the user to communicate with the computer and know how the computer is responding to commands which are done primarily through the monitor, keyboard, and mouse along with their interface components in the main computer box.
* A power supply which provides the electrical power to the components in the computer box.

Data transmission

Data transmission is the act of sending data from one place to another. Data is transmitted both inside and outside your computer. There are two fundamental methods of data transmission.

* Serial – Data is sent on a single line and one bit is sent at at a time. This is similar to a line which one item must come one after another.
* Parallel – Data is sent on more than one line at a time. This may be any number of bits at a time, but is usually one word at a time (two bytes) or possibly three bytes at a time.

Data Structure

Computer data is in what is called binary format. This means that it is always a 0 or a 1. It only has these two states and must be in one of them.

There are several fundamental data units which include:

* Bit – A data unit which must be in one of the two binary states described above. It is the smallest data unit that exists.
* Byte – 8 bits of data which has a possible value from 0 to 255.
* Word – Two bytes or 16 bits of data with a possible unsigned value from 0 to 16535.

AIR LINES ( Joke)

Airo Airways

“This is Captain Sinclair speaking. On behalf of my crew I’d like to welcome you aboard Airo Airways flight 602 from New York to London.

We are currently flying at a height of 35,000 feet midway across the Atlantic.”

“If you look out of the windows on the starboard side of the aircraft, you will observe that both the starboard engines are on fire.

“If you look out of the windows on the port side, you will observe that the port wing has fallen off.”

“If you look down towards the Atlantic Ocean, you will see a little yellow life raft with three people in it waving at you. That’s me your captain, the co-pilot, and one of the air stewardesses”

Move with the flow – learn to let go

We tend to cling to every object in our lives. We hold on to our profession, relationship or possession as if our entire world depends on them. We are so busy clinging to our own lives, that we have forgotten to live with the flow. We are afraid to move ahead, afraid to let go.

Life in essence is like an unobstructed, unrestrained, uncontrolled flow of a river. Life flows at its own pace and the ultimate source of all our pain and sufferings is our tendency to cling to and obstruct the flow. Professional life stagnates, relationships are broken, possessions are lost; all because we refused to let go when we were actually required to let things take their own course.

Why do we cling? We cling because change scares us; we cling because we are afraid to face the unknown, to face challenges; we cling because we feel secure if the status quo is maintained; we cling because we refuse to believe that life can never be static; because we refuse to accept the transience of everything; we believe that everything is in our hands. We do not have enough faith in life and that higher force which is omnipotent and omnipresent. In the chaos of existence, we have lost touch with our higher self. Most of us lead a life which is similar to that of a child who is lost in a crowd, separated from his guardians. He has nobody to place his faith on. He is afraid, insecure, suspicious about everyone and everything.

We live under the false illusion of having everything under our control. The spirit of getting things done becomes a problem when we continue to cling on even after we have exhorted all our efforts. We are overwhelmed by a sense of despair and disillusion when things move beyond our control. It is at this stage we need to learn to let go. Several times relationships are broken just because we tried too hard to make them work. We didn’t give the breathing space they required to grow. We didn’t let go and let them take their own course.

Professionally or personally, once all the efforts are made towards achieving a goal, we must learn to let go and let life take the best course. It might or might not be of one’s choice, but if we have faith, we will realise that it inevitably is the best course. We need to believe that forces above us are far better equipped to make judgments for us. We must learn to have faith in their judgment. Letting go, however, does not mean turning into a fatalist. One cannot sit idle in life and expect life to take care of itself. Karma, the fulfilment of one’s duties is the ultimate objective of all human existence and if we fail to fulfill our duties towards life, life inevitably fails us.

When God gives us dreams, He shares them with us. Whatever we consider our dreams, are actually His dreams and He gives us the capability to realise them. The part we are required to play is to ensure the optimum usage of the capabilities bestowed upon us. And once we have played our part with utmost honesty and effort, we need to let go, step aside and let God step in to fulfill our dreams. After all, they are His dreams, too.

Allow Boss To Speak First

The project manager, the software engineer, the hardware engineer & the genie

Three men: a project manager, a software engineer, & a hardware engineer are in Ft. Lauderdale for a two-week period helping out on a project.

Abt midweek they decide to walk up & down the beach during their lunch hour. Halfway up the beach, they stumble upon a lamp. As they rub the lamp a genie appears & says “Normally I wud grant u 3 wishes, but since thr r 3 of u, I will grant u each 1 wish.”

The hardware engineer went first.
- “I would like to spend the rest of my life living in a huge house in St. Thomas, with no money worries and surrounded by beautiful women who worship me.”

The genie granted him his wish and sent him on off to St. Thomas.

The software engineer went next.
- “I would like to spend the rest of my life living on a huge yacht cruising the Mediterranean, with no money worries and surrounded by beautiful women who worship me.”

The genie granted him his wish and sent him off to the Mediterranean.

Last, but not least, it was the project manager’s turn.
-”And what would your wish be?” asked the genie.

- “I want them both back after lunch” replied the project manager!

Anger Management

Sometimes when you are angry with someone,
it helps to sit down and think about the problem.

How excessive attention & goodies spoil kids

The behavior of a spoiled child is usually unsettling for his/her parents.

Spoiled misconduct may involve one or more of the following characteristics:
~ The child does not obey — for instance, he/ she will keep right at what he/ she is doing, in spite of being told to stop or discontinue a particular activity.

~ The child does not co-operate with parents, or heed their advice and suggestions.

~ Very often, spoiled children back-answer and defy their parents, to prove their assertiveness.

~ Spoiled kids don’t understand the difference between their needs and their wishes.

~ They insist on having their own way under any circumstances, and make unjust and excessive demands of others.

~ They are always seeking attention, and don’t respect the rights and wishes of others.

~ They try to control people.

~ They have very low tolerance levels, and frequently complain of boredom.

~ Spoiled children whine or throw tantrums often.

If your child exhibits one or more of the characteristics mentioned above on a regular basis, it is very likely that he/ she is being spoiled, and that there is a flaw in your disciplining methods. So what do you do to prevent or reverse such a situation?

Here are a few pointers on how to handle a spoiled child:

~ Set your child rules and limits as per his/ her age and level of responsibility:

Just as parents have a responsibility to keep their child’s environment safe, they also have a responsibility to take charge, set limits and lay down rules for the child. Youngsters thrive on rules and limits. Hearing ‘no’ occasionally is good for them.

Parents need to let their children know the rules in advance, and follow through with them. Your child will still love you, even if you say ‘no’ at times. Explain why your child isn’t allowed to do or have something, but you don’t need to provide a reason for every rule. Sometimes, it is just because ‘that’s the rule’.

And rules are not open to negotiation. Some examples of rules include going to bed on time, not hitting anyone, eating meals at the dining table, etc. Children need external control until they can develop self-control and self-discipline. Remember, as your child grows older, reduce the limits imposed, and increase the freedom.

~ Offer choices where possible:
In situations where there are no fixed rules, give your children opportunities to make a choice — for instance, which book to read, which toys to take to the park, which clothes to wear etc. Make sure your kids know the difference between areas in which they have choices, and areas in which they do not.

~ Understand your child’s upsets:
Distinguish between your child’s needs and wishes. Needs include relief from pain, hunger, fatigue, and fear. The best thing to do at such times is to hug your child and respond to his/ her crying immediately — for instance, if it’s hunger that’s the problem, provide food immediately, and if it’s fatigue, put the child to bed at once. When crying is part of a child’s tantrum, however, ignore it.

~ Never give in to tantrums:
Children throw temper tantrums to get your attention, to wear you down, to get you to change your mind, and to get their own way. Crying is used to change your ‘no’ to a ‘yes’. Tantrums may include whining, complaining, crying, breath-holding, pounding the floor, shouting, throwing things, or slamming a door.

As long as your child stays in one place and is not too destructive or in a position to cause any harm, you should feign ignorance during a tantrum. If you are not able to handle the shouting, leave the room. But don’t give the child extra attention by lecturing or nagging, and don’t give in to the tantrum either.

Don’t punish children for crying, call them crybabies, or tell them that they shouldn’t cry. Accept what they are feeling, but don’t give in to their demands. If you give in, the child will learn that throwing tantrums is a way to get things done.

~ Teach your children to cope with boredom:
Assuming that you talk and play with your children for several hours a day, you do not need to be by their side constantly, nor is it necessary to provide them with structured activities or a constant companion at all times.

When you’re busy, expect your children to occupy themselves with art and craft, toys, books etc. Even one-year-olds can keep themselves busy for 15 minutes at a time. By the age of three, most children can keep themselves entertained for half their spare time. When you tell your children to find something to do on their own, you are doing them a favour. A lot of creative development, thinking, and imagination stems from coping with boredom.

~ Teach your child to be patient:
Waiting teaches a child how to deal with frustration. All adult matters in which they have no part to play hold some degree of frustration for youngsters. Learning to be patient is something children must learn gradually, and it takes practice.

Don’t feel guilty if you have to make your child wait a few minutes now and then (for example, when you are having a chat with a friend in person, or on the phone). Waiting awhile doesn’t hurt children, but teaches them perseverance and patience at the same time.

~ Let your child face normal life challenges:
Changes such as moving home and starting school are normal life pressures. These provide kids with opportunities for learning and problem-solving. Always be available and supportive, but don’t help your children with situations they can handle themselves. In short, don’t overprotect them. Their coping skills and self-confidence will benefit them in the long run.

~ Know when to encourage your child:
Children need encouragement, but don’t overdo it. Encourage them for good behavior and obeying the rules. Encourage them to try new things and work on difficult tasks, but teach them to do things for their own satisfaction too.

Self-confidence and a sense of accomplishment come from completing tasks that they set themselves. Giving children excessive attention whenever they accomplish something, however, can make them praise-dependent and demanding. Avoid the tendency to overpraise commonplace achievements.

~ Teach your children to respect the rights of adults:
A child’s needs for love, food, clothing, safety, and security are obviously first priority to the parents. However, your needs are important too. This is especially true of working parents — their time with family is limited.

Both the quality and quantity of time you spend with your child is important. Quality time is time that is enjoyable, interactive, and focused on your child. Children need some quality time with their parents every day. But spending every free moment of your evenings and weekends with your kids is not good for them, nor for you.

You need a balance to preserve your emotional wellbeing and mental health. Spending time with your spouse or friends will not only nurture your adult relationships, but also help you return to the parenting role with more to give. Children should learn how to accept separations from their parents. If they aren’t taught to respect your rights, they may not learn to respect the rights of other adults either.

~ Don’t buy your child goodies as a means of bonding with him/ her:
If your parent-child relationship is based on a supply of material goods, your child won’t have the chance to experience unconditional love. Instead, spend time with your child. Do things together that both of you enjoy. In case you haven’t been able to spend time with your child lately, don’t take him/ her shopping to make up for it and lessen the guilt you may feel. A better option is to take your child on an outing, and catch up on the days that you have missed.

Naughty Mind — High Expectations

It was professor smith’s first day at st. Johns medical college as a faculty. Known for his teaching excellence, he made his entry into a classroom of 1st year medical students, where he received a warm welcome from the students, followed by their intro.

To start with, he planned to put forth a question to the class. He said, “Well students, before we start off with today’s lecture, let me ask you a simple question on human anatomy”.

He gazed across the classroom, spotted a female student Suzie, and said, “Tell me Suzie, which part of the human body grows 10 times its original size when excited?”

Hearing this question, Suzie’s face grew pale in embarrassment, she replied:” you should be ashamed to ask such a question to a female. I am sorry, but I can’t answer your, this question”.

Thwarted by the girl’s reply, professor smith rolled on his sight around the classroom afresh, to find out if there was anyone else who could satisfy his query. This time he located a male student Henry, who had already raised his hand in affirmation to answer the question, and allowed the lad to go ahead.

Henry answered: “Pupil of a human eye”.

The professor applauded for the boy’s accurate answer; then turned back to Suzie and said: “look, Suzie, I am sorry but, I must tell you a couple of things:

(1) You lack knowledge
(2) you have a dirty mind and
(3) Your Expectations are too high !!!!!!!(10 times……….huh……MY GOD!!)